Chris Rahmeh's Wiki Page:

 

About: My name is Chris Rahmeh. I'm an art major and media minor here at Austin College. I am interested in this class because I am curious about different online media and the creative potential it holds. As a kid I was very into cartoons. I loved reading the newspaper comics like Calvin and Hobbes, Get Fuzzy, Pearls Before Swine, among others. I also love online comics such as Axe Cop, Bearmagedon, and the Oatmeal as well as graphic novels like Scott Pilgrim. I also enjoy making my own comics and graphic novels and have created a variety of them over the years.  Besides comics I am also an avid film junkie and enjoy going to see current movies at the movie theater with my like-minded movie nut dad. Other types of media I enjoy are video games and music. Although I have such a passion for more analog media types such as cartoons I would consider myself a primarily digital based person on a day to day basis.

 

Essential Narratives:

 

1. Get Fuzzy (comic by Darby Conley): Get Fuzzy is kind of like your typical roommates in an apartment drama only catch is one of them is a cat, one is a dog, and the other is their befuddled owner. The cat named Bucky Katt is a sociopathic nutjob who loves to irritate his other roomies as well as come up with insane schemes to become famous and inflate his large ego. Satchel Pooch the dog is sweet and dimwitted and is the main object of Bucky's hostility. Rob the human tries the best to keep the chaos in control and provide for the dysfunctional family. This comic strip is a huge reason why I got into cartooning and has always been a constant inspiration to me. On a more strange note I also worshipped Bucky Katt and tried to get him elected class president of my middle school in seventh grade. Links: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Get_Fuzzy, http://www.gocomics.com/getfuzzy,http://www.universaluclick.com/comics/getfuzzy/.  

2. Anthony Green (musician/singer):  Anthony Green is one of my favorite artists and is a hugely inspirational figure for me. He has been in many different bands including Audience of One, Zolof The Rock and Roll Destroyer, Saosin, The Sound of Animals Fighting, and he is most widely known for being in Circa Survive and his solo work. Anthony Greens voice is very unique and has a very beautiful and resonant quality to it along with being very high pitched. His music is also generally very odd with spacey sounds, weird time signatures, and sometimes strange sounds or instruments. He sings about a variety of different subjects and his views on religion, drug abuse, depression, and other heavy handed subjects are very powerful and resonant to me. Links: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anthony_Green_%28musician%29, http://anthonygreenmusic.com/, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RfbnSb8kFkI&list=PLH22-xSMERQqUX3ogTqRNTqgzOZbdoxeW

3. Scott Pilgrim (graphic novel by Brain Lee O'Malley): Scott Pilgrim is a series of graphic novels by Canadian artist Brian Lee O'Malley centering around Scott, a lovable dimwitted loser who is in a band called Sex Bob Omb with his equally eccentric friends. Scott meets the girl of his dreams one day named Ramona Flowers and proceeds to dump his girlfriend, 17 year old Knives Chau, to pursue this enchanting woman. Unfortunately for Scott Ramona comes with quite a bit of baggage in the form of seven evil ex boyfriends hellbent on fighting Scott for Ramona's love. Scott Pilgrim is one of the most unique and surrealistic things I've ever read blending together comics, video games, kung fu, and drama for a intriguing read.  I love the art style, the mish mash of genres, and quirky humor in Scott Pilgrim. It is a constant source of inspiration for me when I am drawing my own cartoons or graphic novels. Scott Pilgrim was also made into an epic movie!

Links: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scott_Pilgrim, http://www.comicvine.com/scott-pilgrim/4050-25478/, http://scottpilgrim.wikia.com/wiki/Scott_Pilgrim

4. Harry Potter (Novels by J.K. Rowling): Harry Potter is a series of novels centering around a boy wizard prodigy who attends a school for magic instruction called Hogwarts. Throughout the series Harry makes a variety of magical friends and learns about his connection to a dark wizard named Lord Voldemort. Harry must grow as a wizard and uncover Voldemort's darkest secrets in order to have any hope of defeating him. Harry Potter's excellent characters and the world which they inhabit is enchanting and exceptionally realized. It's one of those series that is easy to get lost in and obsess over. Whenever I read/re-read them I feel like I am a student at Hogwarts. Few media pieces have managed to suck me in so much. Harry Potter is a great series and excellent example of exceptional storytelling. The Harry Potter series has expanded into movies, toys, video games, theme parks, and more. It's kind of its own media empire.

Links: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harry_Potter, http://harrypotter.scholastic.com/, http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Harry_Potter

5. Prince of Persia The Sands of Time (Video Game): Prince of Persia is a video game about a young Prince who discovers a mythical treasure called the sands of time during a battle with the Maharajah's army. A traitorous Vizier who aids the Prince in battle  tricks the Prince into unleashing the sands and creates an army as "infinite as the sands themselves" by essentially turning the inhabitants of the city into sand monsters. Amiss the chaos the Prince finds a dagger which allows it's wielder the power to wind back time as well as slow it down. The Prince reluctantly teams up with the Maharajah's daughter, Farah, in order to undo the disaster caused by the sands and defeat the treacherous Vizier. The resulting story is still among one of the best I've seen in a video game. Prince of Persia has absolutely fantastic platforming with a focus on varied acrobatics such as running along walls, climbing columns, and swinging from poles.  Combat expands on the acrobatics by allowing you to vault over enemies heads in stunning slow motion and dodge attacks with a variety of flips and handsprings. Despite the fact that the game is very old, seeing these elements in action still leaves me breathless even to this day. I have replayed this game countless time and each subsequent replay is just as magical and delightful as my first playthrough. "Prince of Persia The Sands of Time" has also spawned several sequels and it's own rather shitty movie.

Links: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prince_of_Persia:_The_Sands_of_Time, http://www.ign.com/articles/2003/11/07/prince-of-persia-the-sands-of-time-4, http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0384444/ 

 

 

A GIF I Made

Authors statement: This was a little video of me being silly that I made into a GIF. To me the GIF emphasizes the importance of being yourself and not taking yourself too seriously. It's a great thing to just be dumb every once and a while and make people laugh. Laughter is one of the best things you can do with your life. On makeagif.com I jokingly named my GIF "to all the h8rs." Partially to emphasize the importance of being yourself and not caring what other people think and also poking fun at the super comment driven world we live in on line where GIFs, blogs, and other media receive a lot of poorly worded and spelled hostility in the comments section. All you h8rs can go suck it.

 

 

 

50 Ways to Tell a Story Ideas:

FiveFrameFlickr

Frame 1. Scorching hot sun

2. Very unhappy looking little kid

3. Melting snowman or ice cream cone

4. Picture of House

5. Kid in bed watching Netflix looking very happy 

 

Workshop 1:

Thunder Road 5 Photo Story

 

1. A woman exiting from a screen door her dress gently waving. (Represents first stanza of the song with Mary slamming the screen door her dress waving.)

2. A man sitting on his porch by the screen door looking sad and lonely. (Represents the rest of the first stanza. Man singing about how lonely he is and how he wants the girl back.)

3.  The woman hiding beneath her covers also looking sad and depressed. (Represents second stanza with the girl hiding in the covers in pain and reminiscing on past lovers.)

4. The man and the woman holding hands by a car, most likely a Chevrolet. (Represents third stanza with the man and woman taking hands and getting ready to ride down Thunder Road.)

5. The car/Chevy driving off down a road with thunder in the background. (Represents the rest of the third stanza and the fourth stanza with the man and woman going down Thunder Road together.)

 

I feel like the song Thunder Road deals with a relationship between a man and a women that is falling apart. The first stanza/picture is about the woman leaving. The door slamming indicates that things are not going well between them. The second and third pictures represent the man and woman's disdain at being apart. The man feels lonely and wants the woman back and the woman is depressed, hiding behind her emotions and reminiscing on past failed relationships. The fourth picture is the man and the woman getting back together after a fair bit of pleading. Sure things are rocky but the two feel like it might work. The fifth picture is them riding down the metaphorical thunder road. The man and the woman are back together and trying again at their relationship. The road ahead of them might be rough and filled with "thunder" but they are determined to make things work and leave all the negative stuff behind.

 

Idea for a Portfolio Project For 2/20 class

I started making a game on twine that centers around a person waking up and getting out of bed and out the door. The catch here is that getting out of bed and out the door proves trickier than it seems. Your alarm clock punches you back when you try to turn it off, remember the "the floor is made of lava game you played as a kid" ....the floor might actually be made of lava, your toothpaste is filled with ants, your shower sprays spaghetti instead of water. These and other dastardly happenings that hinder your progress from getting out the door and on with your life...whatever that is. Do you have a life? Maybe you should just stay in bed and watch TV, it might be easier? That and you might also be the pancake overlord... Some possible statistics to track would be, deaths, laziness, number of times you went back to sleep, things you've eaten that you maybe shouldn't have eaten, ect. 

 

Twine Game Link to what I've made so far:

http://twinery.org/2/#stories/9b5a80b1-dccb-84a1-3fec-23e51bfcf828

I've started making the storyboard for my game. 

 

5 Photo Story

 

 

 

 

Authors Statement: I saw the meme I used for the fourth picture while perusing the internet a few days ago and fell in love with it. I decided I wanted to base my five photo story around it. The story centers around a happy content cow minding his own business, as illustrated by the first picture. The cow then gets milked (2nd picture) and is absolutely devastated (the Scream cow in the third picture.) The cow vows to steal their souls (fourth picture). The fifth picture (the American Gothic with skull faces) represents the aftermath of the cows dirty soul stealing work on the horrible people that milked it.  The story is meant to be absurd and humorous and also highlights several important things to me. For one I have a very strange obsession with cows, two I love odd stories, and three I used several absurdist recreations of famous art pieces because I love art/am an artist. My main interest is absurdist art, which luckily I've somehow was able to fit in the realm of my story.

 

Idea I have for Remix Video

Take clips from the two movies Grand Torino and Up to show how they are essentially the same movie. Set to catchy theme music from up.

Clip set  one: Illustrates how the protagonists are both grumpy old men.

Clip set  two: Illustrates how both the protagonists wives die.

Clip set three: Illustrates how both have to deal with annoying kids they aren't very fond of.

Clip set four: Illustrates how they become best friends with the kids.

Clip set five: Illustrates how they make loads of unlikely friends.

Clip set six: Illustrates how they both have something (house in Up) (Grand Torino in Grand Torino) that is very precious to them that they are reluctant to give up.

Bonus Clip set: They both have cute yellow dogs.

Questions I would need to answer in order to make this video.

1. What are the storylines from both movies and how do they relate to each other?-I will watch both movies or refresh myself by reading plot summaries or synopses and make my own comparisons from there. If others have already made comparisons I can draw upon those as well.

2. How am I going to arrange my story/arguement?-I will have to finalize each of my comparisons and arrange them in a way that resembles an intriguing story or argument about why these movies are similar.

3. Which video clips from each movie am I going to use to make my point?-I will have to decide on which arguments and comparisons I am going to make about each movie. I will then have to watch the movies and reflect on which scenes and clips illustrate my points and then draw those clips out.

4. What other ways should I use to make my point?-I might have text explaining my points in between video clips or possibly narration. If the video clips alone do not suffice.

5. What can I do to make this more interesting?-Probably set it to music, add commentary, a title and credits screen to tie everything together and make it a more complete package.

 

In Class Storytelling Exercise

And so the group of friends hung a banner to surprise their friend for his birthday, it read "Happy Birthday Fuckface." 

 

He entered the bar at 11 AM by himself and brought himself his first legal drink.

 

Headlines lined all of the papers, news shows blew up, and over social media sites there was a buzz of heated controversy. Apparently one of the fraternities at OU might be racist?

 

Chris looked out the window and saw the ground littered with white powder, and just in time for his test. Chris was overjoyed that his snow dance actually worked.

 

Chris looked out the window and saw the ground littered with gummy bears. Gummy bears were falling from the heavens and spreading joy and yummyness to the populace. Chris was overjoyed his gummy bear dance actually worked.

 

Remix Video Finished

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IKIDwoYhwus

Authors Statement: The goal of this video was to point out the similarities between the movies Up and Gran Torino. I set about accomplishing this goal by watching the two movies and coming up with a list similarities between them. I then chose clips from the movies that illustrate these similarities and edited them together into a cohesive video. Text explaining each of my different points breaks apart each segment of the video along with clips to illustrate those points. I got the idea for this project by watching Gran Torino and Up in very close succession over Jan Term and coming to the conclusion that they both followed the same basic story structure albeit being very different movies tone wise. I thought the many coincidences between them were really funny and am glad I got the chance to make a video illustrating these points.

 

DNN Project Proposal

Set in a distant future, wars and disagreement about our religion and basic ideals  tore apart our planet Earth and reduced it to an apocalyptic wasteland. The remaining humans of Earth looked desperately for something else to worship because without something to cling to they felt hopelessly lost. They decided to revere something a little more practical and thusly decided to worship the things that gave them food, clothing, and other necessary provisions....farm animals. Inevitably there was some disagreement about which farm animals to worship and mankind split into four separate religious factions: cows, chickens, pigs, and goats. Also inevitably these factions hated each others guts and were often at war with one another. My story will drop the audience into the middle of a heated war and tell the story of each faction through separate media outlets. At the end I'll allow the audience to pick their favorite faction and lead them in the final climatic battle to see which farm animal is the true deity of Earth. The audience for my piece will most likely be a mature one, 18 and up because the subject matter and humor will definitely be geared towards older audiences. The overarching war tone is generally geared towards guys but the humor and absurdity of the story should hopefully appeal to a wider audience. The media I have in mind will probably range from comic strips, to blog posts, to facebook pages, websites, or videos to illustrate the stories of each of the four factions but will most likely change once I figure out the affordances and which type of story I want to tell for each one.  The final battle will most likely be a twine game where the player would have the option to choose which faction they want to fight with at the beginning and embark on a choice driven story based on which one they choose. 

 

 

 

Up Vs. Gran Torino 2nd Draft

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U24qgFdr84M

 

 

Interactive Fiction Laundry List of need to dos....

1. Finish the main story (right now I need to finish, bathroom, getting dressed, and downstairs.)

2. Finish up all the subsections that comprise those elements and link them together somehow.

3. Think up what I want my multiple endings to be, based on the players play through.

4. Code in a tally of progressiveness, laziness, and deaths points.

5. Decide how many points I want players to have to unlock each ending.

6. Code in how many points they need to unlock the endings.

7. Write out each ending.

8. Play through my game a lot to make sure it's not buggy as shit (probably will intersperse this step in between the other steps)

9. Have other people play through my game to make sure it makes sense (it doesn't) and that it is playable.

 

 

Google Search Bar Story Concept Idea

A person tries to cook something and the results keep getting more and more disastrous. He has to use google for help. 

Ex Searches:

Easy meals to prepare.

How to put out grease fires.

Basic first aid for burns,

How to tell is something is edible?

Replacements for melted kitchen parts.

Can something you cooked be sentient?

Help, my dinner is trying to eat me.

 

Process:

I would need to research how to make a search story to do this.

I should probably add music.

I need to arrange my searches into a cohesive plot.

I need to be familiar with the basic colloquialisms for google searches.

I would probably figure out my story first, then think up my google searches, then try to arrange them into a story, figure out how to make a search story, add music, etc.

 

 

My Schedule I have 40 points want 160

April 17-Attempt to finish IF and possibly playtest component. Would give me 50 points. I would have 90 and need 70 more.

April 24-Make a remix video that is significantly more appropriate and meaningful than my other one....  I would have 105 points and need 55 more.

May 2-(maybe try and give feedback on peoples work for the collaborative badge 40 points) I would have 145 points ideally and need 15 more.

May 8-Make a digital story videp (I did this in DVP so it should be acheivable) I would have 165 points and be donezo hopefully.

 

My Interactive Fiction (html link I think....)

 

Can I get out of bed today- (2).html

 

Hopefully this link actually works. I googled around how to do this and this one should be the correct link. I figured out the points system but couldn't figure out how to add in the bonus endings based off the points. I'm not entirely sure that it needs the bonus endings. 

 

Play tester Feedback:

 

Mary Frances Nelson: 

The main goal of the game is to get out of bed despite having interfering dreams and a seemingly destroyed home. The game gives you several options at each stage with a description of your current situation. Your choices often lead to even more complicated situations. The game is fun because it shows the immense amount of  imagination someone can possess when dreaming, or trying to avoid being a productive member of society. It also has surprising twists and turns at each stage that will most likely cause you to gasp or laugh out loud. The only confusing thing about the game is the difference between the undo button and returning to the previous checkpoint. Besides fixing a few typos, I believe this game is good and probably the most unique text adventure game I’ve ever played. The creator is true visionary. 

 

Will Phillips:

 The goal of this game is for the player to acquire freedom from his bed to start another day in the life of pancake man. The player drags is way throughout the typical day, challenged by typical appearances of various nemeses that frequently invade his morning routine. Pancake must know how to properly respond to his various trials or perish. These occurrences turn equal part absurdist and deadly. If you have never cooked a pancake before you should get used to frequently getting reacquainted with your good friend “reload checkpoint.”

The main engine of the game is various different logic scenarios based in text based format that test the player to make the right decisions about pancake making based on the steps one would make take to cook his various enemies in each miniature battle.

The bizarre absurdist comedy that the game utilizes brings most of the satisfaction into this game. It’s no Zork or anything but it’s pretty hilarious.

I’m going to level with you… I haven’t cooked a pancake since I was ten or so, so that part was kind of confusing I guess.

Nope, the game had a good amount of length to it, I felt that there were definitely plenty of options for the player to choose.   

 

Nick Maldonado:

The goal of the game is to find a way to functionally begin a day without accidentally dying in some random way.  There are a variety of options that you can choose, each with a different fun result that is never predictable.

Most of the choices are asking you what you want to do in the given situation.  When the alarm clock goes off, it asks what my response is.  When I choose to go the closet after getting up, it asks what I want to wear and there is a surprising number of wrong answers that lead to death in really interesting ways.

The game is fun because it is always unpredictable and the wording for everything is funny and attention-grabbing.

The game is slightly confusing in that the scenario is highly unusual, but this makes it fun.  Everything is worded clearly and is easy to follow.

I don’t think the game needs any improvement.  There are a ton of possibilities that all have entertaining results.

 

Revised Version: Can I get out of bed today- (1)(1).html 

 

Authors Statement: 

My interactive fiction was intended to be a humorous anecdote to the relatively simplistic task of getting out of bed in the morning and getting ready for the day. For a lot of people, myself included, this seemingly menial task can be the most difficult part of the day. The game was created to parallel what the task of getting out of bed might actually feel like, the floor is made of lava, your alarm clock is punching you, and everything around you is out to get you. The game is definitely comedic and absurdist in nature; it is intended to make the player laugh as well as perplex them. I also made sure to include many choices for the player to choose from that led to a variety of different endings and fit with a variety of different playstyles. I tracked these styles using a points system of progressiveness vs. laziness, good vs. dickishness, etc. to illustrate what kind of player that person may be. Many aspects of my game were also made to poke fun at other video games and video game tropes. I take stabs at “Grand Theft Auto”, “Pokemon” battles, game glitches, unfair deaths, dress up games, among others. In dealing with the subject matter of laziness and the aspects of living and video game tropes modern society is prone to, my game is an absurdist satire. My playtesters generally enjoyed the game. They found the humor to be funny and well written and the bizarre situations to be interesting and clever. Some aspects of the game confused them because of their bizarre nature but besides a few minor quips, as well as some spelling and grammatical errors, they found little wrong with the game. I tried to work out most of the bugs myself before showing it to them and I was pleased with their reaction. I did a run through of the text and checked for spelling and grammatical errors. I remedied these errors for my final copy. 

 

 

 

 

Fail Badge

 

I was hot off the heels of my first Remix Video for my portfolio. I decided I enjoyed making Remix Videos and had become somewhat proficient at it after working so long with the first one. I was sick one day and bored and decided to make another one just to do something. I decided to remix a music video by Korn with a raunchy little video that had been going around my circle of friends. I enjoyed the resulting video and found it to be very funny. A couple of my friends liked it too. However the video had about zero substance and was wildly inappropriate. Still I thought it couldn’t hurt to submit the video. I don’t really know what I was expecting but the video got rejected and I got a “what were you thinking; maybe we should talk in my office?”  response. I had definitely missed the mark on this one. Especially considering this was a project for school. A lot of my work does contain edgier content but I still manage to inject some substantive values into the work and make it clear what my intent is. My remix video simply didn’t have any substance and was just excessively vulgar for the sake of being vulgar and had no logical intent. I learned that there is a time and place for everything and to take into consideration the audience I am making my piece for.  If I make something to be turned in for a class, it should be well executed, logical, and substantial.  If I am making something for myself it might be a different story. Many lapses in judgement on my part and a lack of clarity and cohesion made this work a failure.

 

Link to Project Prospectus

https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/1TPs3FZuIsNPLnjYrr6Uuw_5TOJJ7Es2IlIs-TfRKplg/edit?usp=sharing

 

4/24 Classwork

The apocalypse has forced the people of Earth to worship farm animals. The farm animal religious groups begin to fight and one emerges victorious.

 

Once upon a time there were several religious groups based on farm animals. Everyday they furthered their group by creating traditions and gathering resources from their animals in order to build a functioning society. One day the groups gained intelligence that the other groups existed. Because of that the groups began fighting to figure out which farm animal was the supreme being. Because of that the groups each created their own unique weaponry and fighting styles in order to stand a better chance in the war. Until finally a full scale war broke out with one of the animals emerging victorious.  

 

Throw the audience into the middle of a violent battle of the farm animal religious groups with no explanation as to what's going on. Stop the action at a moment of high dramatic tension and cut back to the beginning of the story with the initial set up of the religious groups contending with the apocalypse. Back to battle for a bit focus on  the viewpoint of one of the groups. Flashback and tell the story of that group. Back to battle focus on another group and flashback to that's group story. Rinse and repeat. Back to battle someone is victorious. (I actually kind of like this...)

 

5/6 classwork

 

What did you learn from each unit?

Specific topics you would include in your explanation of digital network narratives.

What is next for this field of storytelling?

 

Digital Network Narratives are stories created using digital technologies for the purpose of spreading on the internet. In the first unit of this class we learned what a digital network narrative was and what kinds of things could be called digital network narratives.  We learned about storytelling using games, blogs, videos, social networking, and many more which were supplemented with examples in class and from the Alexander Book. Next we focused on the basic elements of storytelling and how stories follow a certain linear charts and progressions. There can be non linear stories but these stories can still be mapped out so they make sense and follow a sort of narrative structure. We learned about several rules for DNN they are generally interactive, encyclopedic, spatial, and procedural. We also learned about how DNN affect the media including copyright law and the surplus of tools that make DNN easily doable and spreadable by the public. I would define DNN as any story told using digital devices for the purpose of being displayed on the web. I would use youtube videos, memes, social networking as a main examples because they are popular and well known and break them down into the different categories of remix videos, paradys, ect. I think that DNN will continue to grow more and more popular. Even now we see conventions of youtubers, gaming conventions. memers, and other internet famous people. DNN narratives has turned normal people with webcams and some ametuer storytelling tools into celebrities. I think this trend will continue and more and more DNN makers will become increasingly more famous and popular.

 

 

DNN Project

 

Rain poured down from the sky in buckets, engulfing the already treacherous apocalyptic wasteland in a muddy blanket that was slowly getting dyed more and more red from the blood of fallen soldiers. Suffice to say the ground was very stained and sticky. Enough about the sky and the ground, lets focus on what was sandwiched in between them, there was a lot of action going on.  A man wearing a pig nose stepped on a cow turd and the turd exploded rendering the pig-man a pile of shit soaked dust. Several men wearing udders on their heads were   tangled in a mess of pig tails. Other men with pig noses were bludgeoning the udder hatted men with pig hooves. Men wearing chicken beaks over their faces used the razor sharp beaks to peck out the eyes of some of the men with udders and pig noses. They pig-men and cow-men clutched their eyes and screamed, running around the chaos blindly like chicken without heads. Only it was ironically chickens that took their eyes in the first place and those chickens still had heads, that is they did still have heads until one of the cow men brought out a cow with a crazed look in it's eye. The crazed cow let out a moo louder and more fearsome than any moo you have ever heard before in your  life. The force of the moo caused the chicken men who had heads to have their heads explode, thus making them chickens without heads. What is going on, you might ask? How did this happen? Why are there people wearing udders on their heads? Let me explain...

 

The year is 2123, the world has turned into an apocalyptic wasteland after religious wars tore it apart. Feeling abandoned by their gods, the people of Earth turned to worshipping tangible things that actually provide for them, farm animals. Cows, chickens, and pigs to be specific. These beings could provide food, clothing, shelter, and more which is more than the old gods ever did. The newly farm animal religious converts made their own deities, traditions, weaponry, and functioning society based on their chosen farm animal. However there was some disagreement about which farm animal is the true higher power. The farm animal religious factions started fighting with each other. Each was heavily convinced that their farm animal was the one and only and that the others should be persecuted or worse. Eventually full scale war broke out which brings us to where we are now....people dressed up as farm animals brutally killing each other with animal based weaponry in defense of their beliefs. 

 

Back to the battle for a smidgen. The cows were starting to gain some traction in the battle. A platoon of cow men wielding machine gun udders tore apart an oncoming tango of chicken men wielding deadly talons into a mess of blood and feathers. Cow Patty specialists placed a couple of cow patty mines in the around their base, engulfing several pig soldiers in a wave   of cow shit and their own guts. Several dozen pig and chicken soldiers began to charge the base hoping to overwhelm the cows with sheer force in numbers. Unfortunately for the pigs and chickens teamwork wasn't the answer to their problems in dealing with the cow menace because the cow's stampede specialist had a little trick up his sleeve. You guessed it a stampede!!! The stampede specialist unlatched the gates to a formidable looking pen which unleashed a veritable hellstorm of charging cows. The charging pig and chicken soldiers could not compete with a stampede of charging cows and were flattened instantly into the muddy earth, creating what looked like a muddy tile floor of dead bodies which mixed very nicely with the surrounding war. "All hail the almighty udder" hollered the cow army and then proceeded to yell a cacophony of moos at the opposing armies.

 

Find out more about the cows and their back-story by reading this comic. Who knows, maybe you have what it takes to be a cow?

 

 

 

 

That was a little tid bit about our fine bovine friends, they pack quite a moo. Now, back to the battle. The cowcophany of violence unleashed by the cows devastated the chicken and pig ranks. Things were leaning towards the cows favor. The chickens however are a proud bloodthirsty race of feathered friends that do no not take kindly to defeat. Pure white hot hate burned in their beady little chicken-men eyes. Somebodies eyes were going to get fucking pecked out today!! With a lust for revenge burning inside them, the chicken men got into the fowlanx formation and prepared to attack. The cows and pigs didn't stand a chance as a tornado of beaks, talons, and feathers tore them to shreds. Countless eyes got pecked out by those sharp chicken beaks, they littered the ground like grotesque marbles. Chicken men wielding sharp talons of death made a mad dash inside the cow base during all the commotion. They plunged their talons into the cow guards stomachs and ripped out their intestines. The intestines were strewn across the base like spaghetti as more eyeballs were pecked out to join the tasty dish, spaghetti and eyeballs anyone? Several udder machine gun wielders charged the oncoming chicken invaders and fired away. Luckily for the chickens several air force members took to the sky with their feathery wings and rained death from above. The cow base didn't stand a chance against the fearsome chicken air force. There was a smattering helping of fire as explosions as the cow base went down and was taken over by the chicken. The sky basked red in the warm glow of the chickens fiery destructive powers. The chicken commander, GrandmasterCluckCluck69, tore off the cow commander, Reginald Augustus Moo's, head and put it on a stake in reverence to the chickens god, Colonel Sanders. The base now belonged to the mighty chicken army. GrandmasterCluckCluck69 posted about the victory on the chickens tumblr page.

 

Follow this link to read the chickens tumblr page to learn more about the chicken's back-story and history.

http://chickensofnewworld.tumblr.com/

 

Could you be a chicken or will you have your eyes pecked out? Your decision. I would hurry up and decide though because if you get your eyes pecked out you won't be able to read any more of this awesome story. Back to the story though, assuming you still have the eyes to read it. The tide of the battle was turned in the chickens favor, both the cows and the pigs were suffering heavy losses from the chickens vicious attacks. To make matters worse the chickens now occupied the cows base. The pigs knew a lost cause when they saw one. They decided to not waste any more manpower or pigpower and instead go back to their base and get wasted. Their inebriated state would cause them to forget the horrors of the day and allow them to do what pigs do best....party!!! Several troughs full of alcoholic ambrosia were jettisoned for the pig base from the pigs local watering hole Porky's Bar and Trough. Sloppily the pigs guzzled down their drinks and were filled with a new sense of drunken vigor. Like most drunk people the pigs were a tad over confident and decided it would be an excellent idea to do a surprise attack on the chickens and cows. Oinking drunkenly, the pigs charged at the chicken base using their hoof clubs to bash cows who were still trying to steal the base back from the chickens.  The chickens sensed something was amiss and sent out scouts to asses the problem. The pigs curly tail trappers threw their tail traps haphazardly at the base which ensnared the chicken scouts rendering them useless and open to clubbing. Unfortunately for the pigs, when they reached the walls of the base they discovered they were a tad too solid to ram through. Several pigs wearing large pig snouts sneezed on the base and the nasal projectiles were enough to explode the walls, leaving holes for the drunk pig invaders to go through. Now inside the chicken base the pigs began to wreck havoc. The poor chickens were no match for drunken strength and were either hooved, sneezed, or curly tailed to death. The pigs oinked loudly, commemorating their victory. The majority of the pigs proceeded to vomit multiple times in the bases toilet and then pass out in a haze. The designated pig was working very hard to take weapons away from the other still conscious pigs who were brandishing them drunkenly and attacking one another. It was a wild night but once again the party pigs had emerged victorious.

 

Find out more about the party pigs origins and back story by watching this youtube video. Maybe you have what it takes to party with them?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uQQ6eQY7Cng&rel=0

 

Do you have what it takes to party with the pigs? Wait...did you party with the pigs already? I will be very upset with you if you are too drunk to read the rest of this story now. Anywhoodle, the story will continue whether you are intoxicated or not.  The following days after the decisive battle for the cows base were rough on all three of the armies. Many men, cowmen, cows, chickenmen, chickens, pigmen, and pigs were lost in various battles. Each army's numbers were dwindling heavily, yet with hubris corrupting their hearts they continued to keep fighting to figure out which farm animal was the true higher power. Conditions were growing shittier by the day. Food supplies were growing thinner as each groups animals were being slaughtered. Even so the groups refused to use any of the other groups animals for food and found it preferable to eat each other before resorting to such a dastardly low. Soldiers began getting very sick as disease spread like wildfire across the battlefield from the excess of dead rotting bodies. Supplies were running low as well. Weapons and equipment were running out of ammo or were being destroyed in the battles. Still if a soldier from one group came across a dead soldier from another group carrying a weapon they refused to pick it up because it would be blasphemy to use any weapon created from the animal of an opposing group. Thinks were looking very bleak indeed and it seemed like once again history was bound to repeat itself with religious factions wiping out what was left of the earth. Just when things looked like they could not continue any longer a cow soldier tripped over something while trying to obliterate a pig soldier with his machine gun udders. The cow soldier was surprised and reached down to examine what he had tripped on. It was a disc shaped object that was soft and supple and had gooey little nuggets embedded inside it. The weirdest thing about the disc was that it smelled absolutely intoxicating. The soldier seemed to remember the strange disc object from a time long ago but he could not for the life of him think of what it was. He knew it would be blasphemous but the smell coming out of the disc was so intoxicating that the cow soldier knew he had to take a bite. The taste, oh the taste, it was as if his taste buds were being massaged by angels. It was gooey, creamy, and crunchy and sweeter than any beef the soldier had ever eaten. The soldier shouted for everyone to stop fighting and taste the miracle that was this holy disc. However no one was paying any attention to him because they were busy trying tasty treats of their own. A pig soldier wolfed down what looked like multi-colored pills. A chicken was munching on what looked like a rectangular cow patty except it smelled so much better. Groups of animal soldiers were sucking joyously on hard, sticky, brightly colored objects. Where were all these strange foods coming from? The cow soldier looked up at the sky and was almost hit in the eye by a neon green disc on a stick. It was raining food and not just any kind of food, it was really yummy food!! Everyone on the battlefield stopped fighting and began to rejoice at the miracle of food falling from the sky. Soldiers from all groups began to chat amiably among themselves, inviting others to try the new tasty treat they just discovered or to remark at how yummy everything was. A group of women wearing lab coats walked onto the battle field. The men stopped eating and stared confounded, by the strange apparition. The woman at the head of the group began to speak, "we noticed that all you men kept fighting among yourselves and also that there were no women in this story so we decided to change that. Is it really so necessary that you idiots kill each other over a bunch of smelly old animals? We certainly don't think so. That is why we engineered a new food group called candy using material we made artificially. I think you will agree that this food group beats the hell out of your stinking groups and that you guys won't have to fight each other any longer. Why should we kill each other? It is such a useless endeavor. The only thing that should be killing us is our diabetes from all this mother fucking candy." "I can drink to that," shouted a pig soldier sucking on a Jolly Rancher. Every man, woman, and animal on the battle field cheered.

 

That was the story of how the human race almost killed themselves off...again...by their inability to comprise and desire to be right. Go have yourself a heaping bowl full of Skittles and reflect upon what you have just read. Maybe you have the power to stop something similar from happening in the future?

 

 

DNN Project Analysis Statement:

 

The original intention of my project was to create a fully realized apocalyptic world where humanity has resorted to worshipping farm animals and ultimately started fighting amongst each other on which animal was supreme. Each farm animal  religious group (cows, chickens, pigs, and goats) would have different propaganda for it highlighting the groups history and key elements. After going through the propaganda, the player would then pick their favorite religious group and lead them to victory using a "Pokemon"-esque battle simulator that I would create in twine.